feeling... closure

I got home last night at 11:30, and for the third Monday in a row, both Law Student roommate and Preschool Teacher roommate were waiting up for my return. Two weeks ago, I came home feeling inspired. Last week, I was a little less cheerful. And this week? Well this week, I guess I'm disappoited a bit, but also content in a way.

As I reached the top of the stairs, Preschool Teacher roommate asked, "Well?"

I replied, "Well, what?" knowing full-well that she was asking about my intentions of asking out the shy-girl.

Preschool Teacher roommate shot me a dirty look that I deserved, so I asked, with as straight a face as I could, "Any guesses? Law Student roommate? What do you think? Preschool Teacher roommate? Come on... take a guess."

Law Student roommate took a crack at it and replied, "She said 'Yes'."

Studying my face, Preschool Teacher roommate guessed, "She has a boyfriend."

"She wasn't even there!" I fired back laughing. Nope, not at work last night. For all the silly introspection, doubt and excitement, shy-girl wasn't there on my last day of volunteering.

I think Preschool Teacher roommate was perplexed by my apparent lack of sadness. So I tried to explain...

"Maybe it was never meant to be... maybe I should have been bolder when I had the chance. But there's no point in getting down about it now. Maybe I'll see her again, and maybe I won't. At least I can say that I felt attraction for a pretty girl, and sometimes even that, a silly crush, is good enough. It feels good. It's reassuring, you know?"

Preschool Teacher roommate nodded, "I know exactly what you mean."